.....I DONT LIKE PEOPLE...AT ALL....

Not trying to be cynical or anything but honestly people sometimes can be so stupid and truly annoying. Let me vent for a little okay! First off I have a ;lets call her a "friend" that recently found out she was pregnant. well instead of coming to terms with it herself and with her family she decides to drop hints of her current condition via Facebook  Liking Gerber and posting statuses mentioning how she didn't know how her sister handled this for 9 months and so on. she decided to then post her first ultrasound picture of her baby via Facebook to share with 500 of her closest Facebook friends -_- like I just don't get it! Then on the other hand I have friends rushing and getting engaged and what not ,like seriously!!! we're getting married to people we've only known for 6 month?! STOP! No my roommate who  do love , really I do but sometimes! this girl locks herself out the house ,which I fully sympathize with her seeing I've done it a few times already but then after I guess she was ringing and knocking on the door for awhile I answer and she exclaims "about time! I feel for her seeing she explained she was outside was a good 15 min . While rushing upstairs to return to my homework she screams after me"Girl you deaf" ?!SAYYYYY WAHHHHH! NO SHE DIDN'T !! I turned around and yelled back "Girl, don't yell at me  cause YOU locked yourself out "!the position my room is in I honestly cant hear if the bell rings and even if so don't get mad at me for your mistake?! UGHHHH honestly I have no patience and slowly i'm realizing that as bad as it sounds I truly wish more people thought like me cause sometimes the stupidity man...I guess that's America. Well at least I have friends that think like me so i'm not totally crazy...that make me SMILE.

Law School?

This is going to be a very short post. Last night at my Pre-Law fraternity meeting(Phi Alpha Delta) we had a speaker come in. The wonderful Circuit judge elect Josephina Tomayo came in and gave a very enlightening speech about her experience and journey to where she is today. Though her speech of  her Hispanic heritage and coming to this country and working hard  was inspirational and full of humor the one thing that stuck was her opening. she asked a very simple question, Why do you want to be a lawyer? Though it should be a question easy to answer, for me its honestly not. ever since I could remember I've wanted to be a lawyer  as a child maybe I could have come up with numerous reasons but in the point i'm at in my life right now I don't think I could come up with a really good answer. How do you go almost your whole life telling people that your going to do something with your life and at the most important point in your life to make this goal come true you have doubts.I don't know if i'm scared, worried i'll hate it or what but I've never thought of a plan B. sometimes I really want to scream at the top of my lungs .."GOD tell me what i'm supposed to do"! cause honestly i'm lost.who knows maybe i'll end up in law school, or maybe chasing a new dream, its weird to be me and have always had a plan for my life and at a crossroads not knowing whats ahead. I guess thats part of the ride huh? well after much thought and struggle I realized my answer. I  remembered that little girl full of joy and happiness telling people shes going to be a lawyer one day, not because she thought she would live in some fancy house or drive a nice car or even have money but because to her lawyers were helpers. they helped people who needed it and was their voice when it came to the law and doing the right thing. I find complete joy in helping people it makes me feel i guess important in some way.Becoming isnt my childhood dream its , because I don't believe dreams come true that's why they are called dreams. your goal may start out as a dream but sooner or later you come to the conclusion you cant live your life no taking part in it so its becomes a goal or the ribbon at the end of the finish line that you  have to get to and becoming a lawyer someday is a goal I got lost in but not know for sure its what I have to do because I need to have a voice, like I've always had whether it was through an instrument or singing I have to do it. with that.........All I have left to do is SMILE.

Michelle Obama for President!!!

Okay so with the Presidential election around the corner everyone has one been feeling very patriotic and two emotional about their opinions on our country, the sate its in , and the party they are apart of. Now with me being a Political Science Major this is like the best time of year. Now I am registered as a Democrat but I truly see myself as an independent.the other day I had a heated "debate" with a girl who absolutely clearly knew nothing about politics and wanted to voice her opinion  on the matter. let me set up the scene for you. I work at the Alumni center at my school as a receptionist so i'm behind a big glossy cherry wood desk minding my own business when another worker my age come by. we talk every so often and she's a nice girl. I don't know if she just watched some kind of political movie, registered to vote, or just finished a two hour re run of Law and Order but all the girl wanted to talk about was politics. Well me being me I decided to amuse the girl. She starts off by asking me if i'm into politics( uh i'm a polysci major so duh!) and what party i'm apart of . I respond with telling her i'm a Democrat, he reply of course so your voting for Obama( i took it as all black people are democrats and will vote for Obama). I'm already irritated my skin color has no affiliation with my party or who I will vote for. she goes on to say that in her opinion Obama has done nothing in the past four years. NOW IM HEATED!!! Its one thing to be an educated voter and not  favor Obamas policies or the direction he wants to go with the country its another thing to obviously know nothing at all and say he has done nothing. What do you think he was doing the last 4 years ?! Chillin in  the Oval office playing tic-tac-toe?! NO! He was too busy enacting the dream act, letting college students like me stay on our parents health insurance till we're 26( lifesaver!), saved the auto industry, repeal of the don't ask don't tell, pushing for pell grants( again life saver!) and no the latest standing up for women's rights! this girl sat there looking like a deer in the headlights, i guess she thought I didn't know anything I proceeded to tell her no offense but  if you want to fight with a poly sci major on politics don't use Fox news as your study guide..... you will always lose! she went on to explain well she'll never agree with dempocrats because shes a die hard Conservative....WHAT DOES  THAT HAVE TO DO WITH ANYTHING! people being a liberal or conservative has nothing to do with your political party they are two different things. you can be a conservative and be democratic . research !  so after this fight and multiple facebook posts I was clearly on the Obama bandwagon. fast forward a few weeks later MICHELLE OBAMA COMES TO TALLY!  im dying on the inside she is my idol, she is the person I hope to emulate later in life. so I got my ticket and stood in line for 2 hrs to see her.

Me standing in line with my ticket ...woot woot!

Even after getting poured on I still waited cause I knew it would be worth it!

When Mrs. Obama came out and the stadium erupted in cheering and applause it was unlike anything ive ever experienced . her speech made me laugh, tear up, nod in agreement as I compared what she was saying in my life. honestly she inspired me to get a law degree but maybe get into campaigning and do all the behind the scenes stuff.her fire when screaming that no man should tell a woman what to do with her body made me stand up and cheer like never before. It was such an exhilarating experience that I will never take back.so now the question is when is Michelle running for prez?! LOL. anyways this time of year when politics is a cool topic and everyone is fighting honeslty is my favirate time and to see what happens in just a couple of months will be exciting.I can't wait but until then all I will do it....yep you guessed it.... SMILE :)

Back to School!!!

I HAVE SURVIVED MY FIRST WEEK OF SCHOOL!!!!!  this week was filled with craziness. my books alone costed a little over $300 and I haven't event paid for classes yet or anything, college is crazy expensive its not even funny. Anyways let me give you the rundown, so far I have a crazy crush on my french instructor who also happens to be Canadian :b  also in my french class is a super cute English boy from Britain with a sexy accent to match , so basically i'm dealing with the United Nations in that class. then my two anthropology classes seem so interesting and fun i'm so excited to see what they both will enlighten me with this Fall. I'm also taking an online web design class (basically my filler) who knows maybe i'll actually learn something, MAYBE. Okay now to the class that will be the death of me............*drum roll* Law and Society ughhhhh just typing it makes me antsy. This class is going to take everything I have to pass but i'm up for the challenge(nothing can be harder than accounting). I also started my first week working at the Alumni Center and that's interesting... what can I say its work. but on a better note the first fall football game is tomorrow, GO NOLES!!! and its a 3-day weekend(happy labor day, AND financial aid drops Tuesday.. TRIPLE BAM! so there are better times ahead.so now on a Friday evening   getting ready for roomie dinner night, brownies baking, and sipping on a glass of wine makes me.... you guessed it.... SMILE!

Can this day get any worse...?!

When I awoke this past Saturday morning I had so much excitement and energy because I was heading back to my home away from home, Florida State University* enter fight song and Seminole chop here*.
Well not even outside of Palm Beach and 45 min later the weirdest thing happened. My car starts making this grunting noise and shaking and i slow down to  a stop keeping  as much control of the wheel as possible. Turns out my tire completely popped out and all that was left was the rim. so obviously my mother  who was driving behind me comes frantically saying how bad this could have been and and how I did a good job. about 30 min later  and after AAA came to the rescue we were back on the road Tallahassee bound. 
Nothing was going to stop me from making it to my destination.  well 2 hours outside of Tallahassee I call a guy I found  on craigslist the night before ,selling his dresser, to give him the heads up I was almost home and was ready to meet him for the transaction cosidering my place is totally unfurnished. well once in Tallahassee and unpacked I call the guys to meet up and he extends the meeting time . This  continues to happen all day , us playing phone tag and him not being able to meet up that second. so after driving 7 hrs and all day around Tally looking for nightstands and dressers we come home with one nightstand and still waiting for my bed. you know what happened? the guy ignores my call and never shows up , so on my first night back Im officially bed-less.  so my family decide to stay in a hotel that night and one our way  my sister finds out her car battery wont start du to my mother leaving the light on. REALLY!!! I couldnt believe this was happening. so i drove halfway to the hotel to drop them off while waiting for AAA again . turns out I had to turn around cause for the first time ever they actually showed up earlier than expected. on my way back , im not joking like a move I say to myself can this day get any worse....want to know what happened?! IT STARTED TO RAIN......RAIN!!!  I couldn't believe how my day turned out. but even in my worst moments I was grateful that at least I was alive and well that day and that makes me smile   lets be real I wasn't smiling that day lol but hopefully in the days to come I will lol.

Forgiveness

Now i'm not going to lie, this topic has NEVER been the easiest thing for me to do *prayer insert here*. I'm the type of person that does hold grudges and once a person really hurts me will easily just cut them out of my life. But even with all my imperfections I do sometimes find it in my deepest heart of hearts to forgive if  its the right apology(  I do have a heart). I've had my share of  horrible best friends and trusting people that honestly just didn't have my best interest. With  age though I feel that I've learned one, to pick my battles and that everything happens for a reason. Maybe the person that's in your life right now isn't meant to be in your life 2 years from now. It doesn't have to be a bad thing, its just how life works. Well it has come to my attention that a friend of mine has been hurt by someone she thought was a friend. She was physically hurt and her life was put in danger but it was with the help of  a person bad-mouthing the attacker in the ear and also the consumption of alcohol that escalated the situation. For me I immediately was put off by this person and told her I will not be cool with someone like that and I refuse  to be fake and pretend to chat with someone who is capable of that and put my friends' life in danger. As mad as I am and  bad as it sounds I quote "will not be friends with someone that puts their hands on me" I feel like taking a person like that back you just lose respect for yourself. My friend then told me something that I thought made her look weak , but maybe actually showed her maturity. She told me that she understands my point but she has talked to the person and has sort of forgiven her through tears and apologies and wants me as her friend to be cool with her. Initially I thought to myself ..excuse my language... but what a lil bitch but now I realize maybe she's teaching me a lesson. I mean how am I supposed to talk about being a christian and expect people to accept and forgive my faults if I cant theirs. I mean i'm not perfect. Who knows if she's right or if i'm right but this situation has given me an alternate perspective at forgiveness. Am I completely changed, of course not but has the seed been planted, yes! who knows maybe in the future i'll get better at this forgiveness thing in the meantime i'll just be proud that at least someone was mature enough to forgive even if it wasn't me. because of the forgiveness my friend has shown I SMILE.

Luke 17:3-4 ESV Pay attention to yourselves! If your brother sins, rebuke him, and if he repents, forgive him, (4) and if he sins against you seven times in the day, and turns to you seven times, saying, ‘I repent,’ you must forgive him.”

Home at Last!

So my day started with waking up at 5am in the morning to finish packing up last minute things in my house and I was on the road by 6am heading southbound towards Palm Beach. Driving like a mad horse and downing my redbull like I haven't had a drink in months I was home in record time. It wasn't till I was home I realized how good it felt to be back at a place so familiar. With my sister's running towards me, and hugging me in greeting, and my dog clawing away at my legs wanting some of the attention I thought to myself 2 years ago when I was graduating Highschool what was it exactly that I wanted to get away from? When you're 18 the only thing I could think of was how much I can't wait to be on my own and not have to be under my parents rules and regulations and just be able to be so called "free". It isn't till you're older you realize how fortunate you were living at your parents house not having to worry about real world problems and how carefree you were. In college , yes, we have are crazy wild nights but our days are filled with stress from classes to exams to running low on groceries. Its when we go home to our mom babying us and cooking for us and wanting to do our laundry do we realize how much love our family really has for us and how much we miss it. I think thats why I love coming home its sort of like my vacation from being an adult. and that makes me SMILE.

Just the teeny tiny gift waiting on my bed when I got home, isn't my mom just Amazinggg!

Wanderer

I absolutely LOVE to travel . I always dreamed of going  Europe so when my mother decided to book a family trip across Europe last summer  of course I was ecstatic. I still think about that trip with a smile. Meeting all those different people from different parts of the earth and traveling together through London, Amsterdam, Austria, Germany,Switzerland, Italy, and Paris. It was an amazing experience that I recommend everyone do if they get the chance. Before that trip I applied to study abroad  for a semester in London but once I was there it just didn't feel like me, plus it didn't help that I literally fell in love at first site with Amsterdam, Netherlands. So when I was back in the states I made the choice to cancel my trip back.

                                              My Family in front of this inspiring  cutout statue dedicated to the soldiers in Switzerland.




Well the reason I'm talking about this is because ever since then I've been bitten by the travel bug I want to go everywhere and anywhere I even love  finding new exciting places in my backyard of Tallahassee during school.

 After my craving for french macaroons took hold of me my friends and I  went macarooning ( def: mission to find a french bakery and  indulge in macaroons)

                                                      Traveling to an old cute antique town and finding this cool old railroad

 

Cool stuff we found in some of the antique stores.

Moving on I have been on this quest to  find a way to go back to Amsterdam  and there are no study abroad locations there for my school. :(  so what to do. My options now is to spend either a semester in Italy  in the Spring  or Summer in France  and whichever I pick to plan my own trip to Amsterdam. So its back to square one on applying for a study abroad spot and fingers crossed I get a spot. traveling and meeting new people and just finding hidden treasured is one of my new found  hobbies and I advise everyone to just go  out , get up and find out whats out in the world whether you go across the pond or just across the street go 

out on a walk in the park or a hike on a nearby trail once you see God's beauty and are alone in your thoughts about how magnificent the world we live in is the only thing that you can do is just well Smile.

P.S  TAKE A LOOK AT A VIDEO I MADE ABOUT MY TRIP ON MY YOUTUBE CHANNEL! 

AU REVOIR!

Just Another day....

I'm the girl with the smile. I laugh uncontrollably and stay optimistic in every situation. This writing a blog thing is so new to me but for some reason i'm drawn to the aspect of recording my life.Waking up this morning the scariest thought came across my mind. You go your whole life always with a plan .  I pushed my parents to purchase a piano at the age of 5. I continued on my musical journey with the clarinet at the age of 10. Around that time I made the decision that I wanted to be a lawyer when I grew up. With this goal and my love for music I went on to high school to be the geeky, cute, smiling girl in the hall that everyone knew would go somewhere. Did I ever feel the pressure ...NO! I was 1st chair in my Marching band , played the piano in a jazz class,volunteered countless hours for the Palm Beach courthouse. It seemed like I was the poster child for a good girl. I was the teacher's pet, christian ,  that loved to go above and beyond. By my senior year I skated through knowing early on I was accepted into Florida State University and going to my dream school. So when did I change . When people say you truly find yourself in college they aren't kidding. I feel like such a  different person. I don't know if I still want to try and go to Law school and I haven't touched an instrument in 2 years . I grew up.  I think the scary thing is knowing I always had a plan I was going to volunteer, here, and do this in high school and go to this college but now that i'm just two years from graduating I've never felt so lost and scared at the same time. You start to question everything in your life. Am I cut out to go be a lawyer, will I get accepted anywhere, what will my life  turn out to be, will I always be alone, and countless others.  even though this  is scary for some reason its exciting to not know what to expect to not plan every moment of your life and to just go with the flow. and maybe that's why through every hurtle and trouble in my life  I continue to be the girl with the smile that laughs uncontrollably  and stays optimistic in every situation. I hope through this blog I can somehow  inspire other people to just enjoy life and SMILE.