Now i'm not going to lie, this topic has NEVER been the easiest thing for me to do *prayer insert here*. I'm the type of person that does hold grudges and once a person really hurts me will easily just cut them out of my life. But even with all my imperfections I do sometimes find it in my deepest heart of hearts to forgive if its the right apology( I do have a heart). I've had my share of horrible best friends and trusting people that honestly just didn't have my best interest. With age though I feel that I've learned one, to pick my battles and that everything happens for a reason. Maybe the person that's in your life right now isn't meant to be in your life 2 years from now. It doesn't have to be a bad thing, its just how life works. Well it has come to my attention that a friend of mine has been hurt by someone she thought was a friend. She was physically hurt and her life was put in danger but it was with the help of a person bad-mouthing the attacker in the ear and also the consumption of alcohol that escalated the situation. For me I immediately was put off by this person and told her I will not be cool with someone like that and I refuse to be fake and pretend to chat with someone who is capable of that and put my friends' life in danger. As mad as I am and bad as it sounds I quote "will not be friends with someone that puts their hands on me" I feel like taking a person like that back you just lose respect for yourself. My friend then told me something that I thought made her look weak , but maybe actually showed her maturity. She told me that she understands my point but she has talked to the person and has sort of forgiven her through tears and apologies and wants me as her friend to be cool with her. Initially I thought to myself ..excuse my language... but what a lil bitch but now I realize maybe she's teaching me a lesson. I mean how am I supposed to talk about being a christian and expect people to accept and forgive my faults if I cant theirs. I mean i'm not perfect. Who knows if she's right or if i'm right but this situation has given me an alternate perspective at forgiveness. Am I completely changed, of course not but has the seed been planted, yes! who knows maybe in the future i'll get better at this forgiveness thing in the meantime i'll just be proud that at least someone was mature enough to forgive even if it wasn't me. because of the forgiveness my friend has shown I SMILE.
Luke 17:3-4 ESV Pay attention to yourselves! If your brother sins, rebuke him, and if he repents, forgive him, (4) and if he sins against you seven times in the day, and turns to you seven times, saying, ‘I repent,’ you must forgive him.”
Monday, July 23, 2012
Sunday, July 22, 2012
Home at Last!
So my day started with waking up at 5am in the morning to finish packing up last minute things in my house and I was on the road by 6am heading southbound towards Palm Beach. Driving like a mad horse and downing my redbull like I haven't had a drink in months I was home in record time. It wasn't till I was home I realized how good it felt to be back at a place so familiar. With my sister's running towards me, and hugging me in greeting, and my dog clawing away at my legs wanting some of the attention I thought to myself 2 years ago when I was graduating Highschool what was it exactly that I wanted to get away from? When you're 18 the only thing I could think of was how much I can't wait to be on my own and not have to be under my parents rules and regulations and just be able to be so called "free". It isn't till you're older you realize how fortunate you were living at your parents house not having to worry about real world problems and how carefree you were. In college , yes, we have are crazy wild nights but our days are filled with stress from classes to exams to running low on groceries. Its when we go home to our mom babying us and cooking for us and wanting to do our laundry do we realize how much love our family really has for us and how much we miss it. I think thats why I love coming home its sort of like my vacation from being an adult. and that makes me SMILE.
Just the teeny tiny gift waiting on my bed when I got home, isn't my mom just Amazinggg!
Friday, July 20, 2012
Wanderer
My Family in front of this inspiring cutout statue dedicated to the soldiers in Switzerland.
Well the reason I'm talking about this is because ever since then I've been bitten by the travel bug I want to go everywhere and anywhere I even love finding new exciting places in my backyard of Tallahassee during school.
Traveling to an old cute antique town and finding this cool old railroad
Cool stuff we found in some of the antique stores.
Moving on I have been on this quest to find a way to go back to Amsterdam and there are no study abroad locations there for my school. :( so what to do. My options now is to spend either a semester in Italy in the Spring or Summer in France and whichever I pick to plan my own trip to Amsterdam. So its back to square one on applying for a study abroad spot and fingers crossed I get a spot. traveling and meeting new people and just finding hidden treasured is one of my new found hobbies and I advise everyone to just go out , get up and find out whats out in the world whether you go across the pond or just across the street go
out on a walk in the park or a hike on a nearby trail once you see God's beauty and are alone in your thoughts about how magnificent the world we live in is the only thing that you can do is just well Smile.
P.S TAKE A LOOK AT A VIDEO I MADE ABOUT MY TRIP ON MY YOUTUBE CHANNEL!
AU REVOIR!
Just Another day....
I'm the girl with the smile. I laugh uncontrollably and stay optimistic in every situation. This writing a blog thing is so new to me but for some reason i'm drawn to the aspect of recording my life.Waking up this morning the scariest thought came across my mind. You go your whole life always with a plan . I pushed my parents to purchase a piano at the age of 5. I continued on my musical journey with the clarinet at the age of 10. Around that time I made the decision that I wanted to be a lawyer when I grew up. With this goal and my love for music I went on to high school to be the geeky, cute, smiling girl in the hall that everyone knew would go somewhere. Did I ever feel the pressure ...NO! I was 1st chair in my Marching band , played the piano in a jazz class,volunteered countless hours for the Palm Beach courthouse. It seemed like I was the poster child for a good girl. I was the teacher's pet, christian , that loved to go above and beyond. By my senior year I skated through knowing early on I was accepted into Florida State University and going to my dream school. So when did I change . When people say you truly find yourself in college they aren't kidding. I feel like such a different person. I don't know if I still want to try and go to Law school and I haven't touched an instrument in 2 years . I grew up. I think the scary thing is knowing I always had a plan I was going to volunteer, here, and do this in high school and go to this college but now that i'm just two years from graduating I've never felt so lost and scared at the same time. You start to question everything in your life. Am I cut out to go be a lawyer, will I get accepted anywhere, what will my life turn out to be, will I always be alone, and countless others. even though this is scary for some reason its exciting to not know what to expect to not plan every moment of your life and to just go with the flow. and maybe that's why through every hurtle and trouble in my life I continue to be the girl with the smile that laughs uncontrollably and stays optimistic in every situation. I hope through this blog I can somehow inspire other people to just enjoy life and SMILE.
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